It's the day before my brother's surgery and I am feeling every emotion on the spectrum. Happy that he is finally getting the ng tube removed but sad because he never deserved any of this anyways. Not being able to be there for him is killing me so I'm doing what I know to do. I'm writing it out.
It is not so much the surgery that we are holding our breaths for. It is the aftermath because that is what almost took his life a year and a half ago. Although there were other factors that played into the complications he had, any plastic tube placed in that general area is a scary thought. Basically, it is supposed to be a routine surgery. However, in my brother's case it will not be. With all of the complications we had last time, it adds a few additional risks.
As mentioned many posts back, when you open skin leading to the stomach, gastric secretions pour out and since the acidity is so high, it takes nothing to burn through the skin. I can honestly say that I do not know all of the effects, or the leading factor as to why this is such a significant surgery. I do know that once they put the new tube in, he may not tolerate feedings right away. But ask me why he wouldn't and I wouldn't know what to say. Bottom line, whether he can tolerate feedings or not and whether the old surgical site is bothered or not are all determining factors to the length of his hospital stay. I'd say worse case scenario, he doesn't tolerate the feedings at all and they are forced to either bring him back into surgery and/or put the ng tube back in. All which are very bad.
That said, I know extremely well it does no good to think about what could happen. My explanation above is indeed a moment of weakness. It is important to recognize the possibility of something going wrong so you aren't caught off guard. But that is as far as I know I should take it. I had a moment the other day where my faith and hope were getting a little shaky. So I did the only thing I knew I could do; I went straight to the bible. The one verse that stood out to me more than the others was this one:
Trials will show that your faith is genuine. It is being tested as fire tests and purifies gold-- though your faith is far more precious than mere gold. ~Peter 1:7
All I want is to trust fully in God. I love Him with everything in me and I want to look to Him; not the scientific statistics or the medical dictionaries. Of course more than anything, I want this surgery to go as well as it possibly can. But I trust my brother is in the best possible hands~ not the doctors and nurses but God.
